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EP #81

How To Drink Less or Stop Drinking: 3 Important Steps to Gain Control Over Alcohol with Katie Lain

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EPISODE #81

Summary

In this episode of the Alcohol Minimalist Podcast, Molly is joined by Katie Lane and Karen Dion, who share their insights on overcoming over-drinking through a three-step process. They emphasize the importance of changing one’s thoughts about alcohol and challenge the conventional idea that abstinence is the only solution to alcohol-related issues. The episode delves into the science behind Alcohol Use Disorder, highlighting advances in medicine, including medication-assisted therapy, which targets the root issue in the brain. The hosts discuss the benefits of tools that help restore the brain to its pre-dependence state, allowing individuals to reintegrate alcohol into their lives responsibly. The narrative underscores the ripple effect of transforming one’s relationship with alcohol on various aspects of life, including health, career, and relationships. The episode also features testimonials from individuals who have successfully undergone the transformative process, sharing stories of weight loss, career advancements, and improved family relationships.

Hey, it’s Molly from alcohol minimalist. What do you do in this October? I would love to have you join me in my more sober October challenge. What do I mean by more sober October, it simply means that we’re going to add in more alcohol free days than you currently been doing, whether that’s one or two or 31. It’s up to you, you get to set your own goal and that’s why it’s more sober October. You can check it out and learn more at get got sunnyside.co/molly It’s totally free. I’ve got prizes, I’m going to be going live every week to announce the prize winners. And it’s just going to be an awesome event. So I would love to have you join me. You can learn more at get.sunnyside.co/molly and you can get registered today. Welcome to the alcohol minimalist podcast. I’m your host Molly watts. If you want to change your drinking habits and create a peaceful relationship with alcohol, you’re in the right place. This podcast explores the strategies I use to overcome a lifetime of family alcohol abuse, more than 30 years of anxiety and worry about my own drinking and what felt like an unbreakable daily drinking habit. Becoming an alcohol minimalist means removing excess alcohol from your life. So it doesn’t remove you from life. It means being able to take alcohol or leave it without feeling deprived. It means to live peacefully, being able to enjoy a glass of wine without feeling guilty and without needing to finish the bottle. With Science on our side will shatter your past patterns and eliminate your excuses. Changing your relationship with alcohol is possible. I’m here to help you do it. Let’s start now. Well hello and welcome or welcome back to the alcohol minimalist podcast with me your host Molly Watts coming to you from well, a partly cloudy Oregon today. It’s been a little weird this weekend. Cloudy, but still warm out was really beautiful has been beautiful for the last week or so. So certainly not complaining. And it’s a little cooler. So I know my fellow Oregonians are all breathing a sigh of relief. And you know, they probably are happy to see the clouds. They live here, right. So we’re used to it. I for one like the sun. And I think everybody that listens to this podcast knows that by now. Anyway, on to this week’s show. This is another in my summer content series. If you heard me talk about it last week. It’s kind of like a summer concert series. But it’s a summer content series. I’m sharing some of my favorite folks my favorite resources people that I listen to people that I think you can get value from. And today is no exception. I have a very short well it was a video on YouTube. So you’re gonna hear Katie say video, but it’s I’m using just the audio. And it’s Katie Lane from Thrive alcohol recovery. And Katie and her partner in business, Karen Dion and I have been connected for a couple of years now. And I really love everything that they’re doing. They are a Sinclair Method program. So if you’re not familiar with the Sinclair method, I did a podcast episode with Katie before on explaining what the Sinclair method was, and now trek zone. And so I will link that in the show notes. But today this this short clip is really fundamentally three things that Katie shares are really necessary, from her perspective on how she changed her drinking habits and changed her relationship with alcohol. And one of the things that we completely align on is that there the thought work and being able to see your future self and being able to really work with your mind and not just focus on the action of drinking, how important that is in this whole process. And so while I gotta tell you, I struggle sometimes with the idea of taking a medication because that really at the at the root, the Sinclair method is a medication based program. I personally wouldn’t have looked for that. I didn’t need that with respect to my own drinking. But I know there are many of you who are really struggling to get control over excessive drinking. And I guess I want to say that I mean, especially if you’re a binge drinker, you really might want to consider naltrexone. And you might want to consider visiting Katie and Karen over at Thrive, alcohol recovery.com. I’m going to link that in the show notes. And I invite you to go check them out. One of my favorite Parts of this piece from Katie is her focus on the future self. I totally agree with this. This is part of building those new identity based habits, right and creating new thoughts about what your future can look like. And we can’t keep ourselves stuck in the past and focused on the past that hasn’t created the results that we want in our lives. Right. So this is where we completely align. And one of the things that we really agree on is that no matter whether you’re using a medication based approach or not, you have to change your thinking about alcohol if you really want to create a peaceful relationship with it. Alright, that’s all I have. I can’t wait to talk to you next week. Again, with another one of my summer content series. I hope you’re enjoying it as much as I am. Here is Katie lane, and three important steps to gain control over alcohol. Have a great week, everybody. Welcome everybody. My name is Katie lane. And in this video, I’m going to show you the three steps that I took and that you can take to to stop over drinking and get back to balance with alcohol. This is such an important video for you to watch. Because when I learned about this information several years ago, it radically changed not only my relationship with alcohol, but also my life. Because when we can repair our relationship with alcohol, it is such a ripple effect into so many different areas of our lives. So just to begin with, you know, I’m somebody who struggled with alcohol for nearly 10 years. And it was not for a lack of effort on my part. Because believe me when I tell you that I tried so many different ways to fix my problems with alcohol, I tried. Aaa, I tried other abstinence based programs, I tried moderating my drinking and planning my drinking, and you name it, I tried it. And what I found was that nothing was working for me. And in fact, my drinking only seemed to be getting worse, my hangovers were getting worse. And I was really getting to a place where I was feeling just greater shame and greater regret, because I felt like I was losing control in my relationship with alcohol. And when I would turn to experts, like physicians or, you know, people in their recovery world, they would all tell me that if you have a problem with alcohol, that your only option is to stop drinking. And to me, I always felt like an extreme solution, because I really believed deep down that I could get back control over my alcohol. When I first started drinking. I was a moderate drinker, I didn’t have issues with it. And so I really and truly believed that I could get back to that place. But I just hadn’t found a way to do so yet. So one hungover morning, like usual, I was scouring the internet, like I always did trying to find an answer to my problem with alcohol. And the reason why you’re watching this video today is that I finally found the answer that I had been looking for for years. And it’s exactly what I’m going to be sharing with you in today’s video. So let’s get started with these three steps. So the first step that you must take is to rethink recovery. And what I mean by that is really just to put aside everything you’ve ever believed, or been told about what it means to overcome problem drinking. If you’re anything like me, I was of the belief that abstinence was my only option that if I had a problem with alcohol, then I needed to just quit drinking. And so that’s what I tried to do literally dozens of times over the course of 10 years. And it never worked for me, I would make it you know, a few days, a few weeks, or even a few months sober. But eventually I would return to drinking again. And I felt like with programs like that, even though I would be sober and not drinking, I would still be incessantly thinking about alcohol and wanting to drink alcohol. And so eventually, it would lead me to drinking again. And so I was wondering, like, Am I doing this wrong? Like why? Why aren’t these treatment programs working for me. And what I’ve since learned is that these traditional treatment programs that promote abstinence alone, Alcoholics Anonymous is arguably one of the most well known treatment programs that there is for problem drinking, it’s known to have a success rate of about 10%. That means for 90% of the people that are going to this program, including myself, the treatment is failing them. And so that’s why I encourage you to rethink recovery because the approach I’m going to tell you today, it’s rather non conventional. And it does not go along with the the mainstream view or believe that abstinence is the only way to go about it. And that’s because thanks to advances in science and medicine and better understanding of how Alcohol Use Disorder functions inside the brain, we now have radically different approaches to tackle the problem of over drinking. And that leads me into my second step, which is to use the right tools, these tools bring treatment for problem drinking into the 21st century, and deal with it on a biological level, which is actually inside of the brain. Because it doesn’t matter if you’ve been drinking for five years, or for 20 years. Or if you drink a fifth of vodka a day. Or if you drink a bottle of wine a day. Everyone who has this experience of alcohol use disorder has the same root issue which is inside of the brain. And the truth is, if we are not dealing with the root issue inside of the brain, what happens is most people just like myself, can get stuck in these cycles of quitting and drinking and quitting and drinking. Because what’s happening inside the brain is that our brain is still craving and wanting alcohol. And so what science has actually shown us is that the longer somebody is abstinent from alcohol, who has been dependent upon it in the past, the more intense their cravings become. And so as I learned this, I that was like a lightbulb for me, like, oh, my gosh, this makes so much sense why I could be six months sober, and still be obsessing on alcohol and wanting to drink alcohol. And so when we use these right tools, which deal with the problem of alcohol use disorder at the root level, which is biologically inside of the brain, one of these tools that we use here at Thrive is a medication assisted therapy, what happens is, over time, our brains can get restored to the state they were in before we ever experienced problems with alcohol. And so the result for most people are fewer alcohol cravings, easier alcohol free days, and just a greater sense of confidence and assurance, knowing that they will no longer over drink. These tools also give people the option to keep alcohol in their life. It’s not a black or white, abstinence or drinking type of approach. In fact, most people who join our program about 75% have a goal to drink moderately, but they just want to get back to more balance and control and the other 25% have an end goal of going abstinent, which is a much easier goal for people to achieve once their brains have been restored. And they are no longer stuck in craving mode. And this is where true healing begins. So the third and final step is to focus on your future self. And this is such a crucial step. And the reason for that is because when we are stuck in patterns of over drinking, it can make it really hard to focus on our future self. I know for me, as I was drinking, you know, my nightly ritual was like a bottle of wine pretty much seven nights a week, I would usually even drink more than that on the weekends. And what I found and what I realized is that I was thinking about alcohol, all of the time, I would start thinking about my evening wine ritual at around 11am Every day, and I’d start looking forward to it and maybe telling myself oh, maybe I shouldn’t drink tonight. You know, I’ve been drinking every day, or do I have wine at home? Or what am I going to drink tonight, my mind would start being preoccupied with the thoughts of drinking. And then as soon as I got off work, I would get home and start my nightly Ryan, which wine ritual. And so all this to say is that when we’re stuck in this cycle of problem drinking, and you know, for a lot of us daily drinking, or nearly daily drinking, it’s really hard to kind of focus on and become excited about our future self, because we’re so wrapped up in the day to day of our drinking habit. And so for me as I started to repair my relationship with alcohol, and again, restore my brain, what I found was that I was thinking about alcohol much less often. And so in some ways, my brain just felt really free and open and expansive. And I started to naturally think about and get really excited about my future. I was setting more goals. I was looking forward, you know, a year or five years from now and really thinking about where did I want to be, again because I was no longer preoccupied with alcohol. And so as we have that vision for our future, it’s really helps to propel us and pull us forward and get us unstuck out of these habits that we might be in with alcohol that may not be serving us. Hey, everyone, just a quick break in the show to talk with you about Sunnyside. Now you’ve heard me talk about Sunnyside on the show before. I’ve had Nick and in the founders here as my guests. I am just so impressed with them. They are deeply mission driven. They are building a service to help millions of people create a healthier relationship with alcohol with no pressure to quit or feel guilty. So you know they are very aligned with everything I talk about here at alcohol minimalist, I wanted to share with you some thoughts and comments made by people in my group and my clients who use Sunnyside. I checked it out and was pleasantly surprised. I have used a few tracking apps and despise to them. But the support the daily check ins and the plan, yes, the plan. I signed up for three months yesterday and actually looked forward to the check in today. I have no doubt this tool is a step forward for me. I just want to thank you to everyone who recommended Sunnyside in this group and all of your advice throughout, I’m having the best start to a week of moderating Since I fell off the wagon in January, you work the plan, and it works. Thank you everyone. Now you don’t have to take my word for it, you don’t have to take their word for it, I want you to check it out for yourself, go to www.sunnyside.co/minimalist to get started on a free trial today. And so as we use these three tools together, the first being rethinking recovery, second, using these tools that really helped to heal the root issue of over drinking. And third, focusing on our future self. This is really a recipe for success for where we can truly change our relationship with alcohol. And again, that does not mean abstinence. What that means is we get back to a place of empowerment over alcohol. And for me, that meant I was having a couple of drinks a couple of nights a week. And that was it because I genuinely did not want more than that. And so right now you have a very important choice to make, you now have information at your fingertips that could help you to truly change your relationship with alcohol for good. And this could honestly be one of the most important decisions you make. Because what I have found and what I’ve seen with so many of my clients as well, is that when we can truly transform our relationship with alcohol, it has a ripple effect in so many areas of our lives. And so I would love to invite you right now to join the alcohol Freedom program. This is a program that you can do discreetly, that you can do on your own time, that will give you all of the tools and resources you need. In order to change your drinking habits for good. This program can be accessed 24/7 through your phone or your computer. And you will have access to expert coaches who will take you through the process of repairing your relationship with alcohol. So I hope that you will join us in the program. And you can do so by clicking the link beneath this video. And I want to just close today with a client story of someone who recently was in our program. And it’s just really telling of how powerful this method and this approach can be. And just to preface this with, we hear success stories like this almost every single day. So this client, she is a nurse and she was drinking two bottles of wine every single day. She was in a place where her drinking was getting to a point where I totally felt out of control. She even told me a story of how on the way to work, she would have to pull over and throw up because she felt so sick from drinking the night before. And she’s someone who had tried Alcoholics Anonymous had tried going abstinent before, and nothing was working for her. But after six months of being in our program and working this protocol, she saw massive changes in her relationship with alcohol. She started the program drinking two bottles of wine a night and after six months, she was drinking a couple of glasses of wine per month, she had also lost 40 pounds, just because of all of the extra wine and calories she was consuming with that. Just by taking that out alone, she had lost all of that weight. And she jokingly said I still eat ice cream all the time, but I still lost all of this weight. And so as she repaired her relationship with alcohol, she also saw massive improvements in her relationship with her husband and her kids. She started focusing on getting a promotion at her work and so she could be working in a more challenging and fulfilling job. She had said that she was kind of existing in her current role not really feeling fulfilled, because she would show up to work hungover so often. And so after only six months, she had made such a radical transformation with her relationship with alcohol that she was hardly drinking anymore, but was able to enjoy wine whenever she wanted to. She had lost 40 pounds, and she was going for a promotion at work and it was having such a positive impact on her relationship with her husband and her kids. So I just want you to be encouraged right now because, again, when we change our relationship with alcohol, it can have such a powerful effect in so many areas of our life. Emotionally, physically, spiritually financially, there can be so many better fits come from it. And through the alcohol Freedom program. What I so often hear from people is that it’s a really gentle way to go about it. You know, it’s not strict abstinent, it’s not white knuckling. In fact, it’s this gradual process of slowly but surely, changing our relationship with alcohol over time in a way that aligns with our personal goals around the type of relationship with alcohol that we want to have. So again, I invite you and encourage you to join the program, you can do so by clicking the link below and just so you know, the program has a seven day money back guarantee. So if you join and you find that it’s not what you were looking for, and you let us know within seven days, we will cancel your membership and refund all of your money. So thank you so much for watching this video. I really hope that it helped you, and I will hope to see you in the program soon. Thank you for listening to the alcohol minimalist podcast. This podcast is dedicated to helping you change your drinking habits and to create a peaceful relationship with alcohol. Use something you learned in today’s episode and apply it to your life this week. Transformation is possible you have the power to change your relationship with alcohol now, for more information, please visit me at www dot Molly watts.com